Whereas changing diapers or clothes used to be cinch, it has turned into a dreaded duel. He wriggles like a fish, twists into pike position with the grace of an Olympic diver, struggles with the ferocity of a caged tiger, and protests as loudly as a howler monkey; in short, he is slowly driving Maman and Papa insane. Recalling Jon's words of wisdom, a proud papa himself, “distraction is key”, I conjure up a toy he can stick into his mouth or attack him with an unexpected zerbert, providing a momentary break for my sobbing, pleading eardrums. And yet, the distractions never lasts long enough to finish the job. Before I know it, he is on his tummy threatening to launch himself over the edge of the changing table like Blondin in a barrel.
I've meditated on ways to sedate him, from tranquilizer shots (what!? they do it to elephants), straightjacket (thereby also eliminating the need to change clothes), to good old fashioned shackles. And don't be fooled by their miniature statures, babies can be very strong. In fact, after a few months more of training, I do believe myself ready to enter the next Stampede. Those calves have nothing that our “determined” boy can't dish out.
Now just over 10 months, the evolution of the K-man is progressing at a fast and furious rate. He learned first to pull himself up into a sitting position. Not a week later, he had hoisted himself up to a standing position using the window sill. The first time he succeeded, he turned around with a wide grin, wildly happy with himself because he was able to look out the window. His current favourite trick is to get himself into standing position, and then slowly dangle one arm out, as if publicly demonstrating his amazing prowess to the world. Check me out! A couple of times, he has thrown caution to the wind (I wonder where he gets that from...) and just lets go completely, wavering in the air for a few nano seconds of hang time, before losing balance and plopping back down to earth landing on his bottom with a thud that would be sure have papa sitting on a rubber donut for several weeks. Of course, you can't learn without falling flat on your face so we will undoubtedly witness many more bonks, close calls, and fortunate landings in the months to come to go along with the scratches that already adorn his chubby cheeks.
Baby proofing our cubicle of a home has been challenging to say the least. Nothing that is beyond grasp will escape from his persistent little hands. More amazingly, I'm beginning to suspect our boy has telepathic powers because he seems to have the uncanny ability to beeline towards whatever object I'm thinking to myself I hope he doesn't go for. “Not the mate, not the mate...shit!” Anything and everything that you don't want him to grab turns into his main target. Supervising Kael is not like being a lifeguard because you actually have to be aware and present of the baby's actions at ALL times. We are forced to constantly shift, rearrange, toss, move and hide things or they end up in his mouth or spilled onto the floor. And even though we went out and bought him some fancy Fisher Price toys that take up more space than our furniture, his favourite toy continues to be Flea's red and black sequenced dog leash. He loves to just sit there and twirl it around like a ribbonist (can you tell the Olympics are still fresh from my similes) before inserting the metal clip on the end in his mouth, After all, who doesn't love a good bite on something metallicky to quench that...what the hell does that quench for him anyways?
And speaking of chewing, he now has six teeth with which to munch his meals with. And he now insists in his determined way to eat by himself, refusing to depend on us parental units for delivery anymore. So we do what all parents must eventually do – give in. And so we plop a mound of mixed up food onto his tray, and watch as he reaches for a handful and then shoves it in the general direction of his mouth. Initially, maybe 10% of the grabbed nourriture made it to his mouth. The leftover after a feeding session would have been enough to feed an ant colony for an entire year. Lately though, I have to admit, he's getting pretty good as his manual dexterity improves. He still winds up with food in his ears, hair and worst of all, up the nose (broccoli up the nose really tickles, you know) but Flea isn't exactly getting a full second meal courtesy of Kael anymore.
Finally, the dreaded period of disciplinary action has begun. I despise discipline. Never wanted to enforce it - even as a teacher. But just as it is crucial to instill in the classroom for there to be any productivity, you must also ingrain it into your children so you don't wind up with spoiled brats. The Kman has definitely reached the age of mischief with intent and therefore instilling discipline early could save us much chagrin in the future.
Flea and Kael's relationship is a one-way affair, but in the opposite direction from what it used to be. In the beginning, Kael would ignore Flea as if she never existed, going on about his business without even acknowledging her presence. My how times have changed. Poor Flea can no longer get a moment's rest without Kael's face lighting up at the prospect of grabbing onto her fur and then beelining as fast and as determined as he can. The maniacal grin that paints his face reminds of Jack Nicholson in the Shining. Flea simply growls, gets up and moves. The scene then repeats itself dozens and dozens of times in the span of a few minutes. The real issue is that there really aren't many options for poor Flea. And now that winter approaches, the outside getaway will no longer be viable either. This has been going on for weeks now with no sign of either one of them ready to change their ways. Again, I don't think Flea will actually ever hurt him, but she does growl pretty deeply whenever he approaches and has come close a couple of times when Kael grabs a hunk of her fur not-so-tenderly- receiving severe reprimand from both mama and papa bear afterwards.
All in all, I'm so in love with my family. Kael's eyes are no less mesmerizing, Flea's no less wonderfully ferral and Michele is no less beautiful and funny in her role as mother. Things may not be perfect in terms of job, house, finances and whatnot, but we've got love and that overrides all else. Now let's hope that we can get rid of this cold virus we've passing back and forth to each other for the past few weeks so we can have our health back to!
I'll leave you with a quote from Alan Watts, which of course made me think of my little guy when he's in the stroller just staring around in amazement at the world going on around him. I just hope I can play a part so that some of that wonder and curiosity never leave him completely.
“Wonder, and its expression in poetry and the arts, are among the most important things which seem to distinguish men from other animals, and intelligent and sensitive people from morons.”
oj
